I don’t have hot flashes, I have short private vacations in the tropics “unknown”
Am still a hot babe, only now it comes in flashes “unknown”
( Oh how we laugh at quotes like these quotations)
As a young woman in perfect health, the last thing on my mind was the menopause. I felt invincible. The world was my oyster and I was the gem . Middle age and menopause was for old people and I was so very far away from that.
Fast forward thirty years and behold here I am in the middle of what our generation now call middle age. So when my body started changing and the recognition dawned on me that this was the start of a change in my life that I could neither control or delay (i.e the menopause) it heralded a rush of confusion about the implication to my femininity/fertility and all that, that entails.
Although this is something that I realise would happen I always thought of it happening later rather that now. Suddenly realisation dawned that later is now and this reality can be frightening. Not because I wanted to cling to the past but more for the unknown that this phase of my life would bring. I had read all the leaflets and books that would prepare me for this moment. Now the moment was upon me and I felt bereft, unprepared and totally alone. Who could/should I talk too?
Should I speak to a girlfriend about it, would it be a conversation that could be had amongst women who had not even discuss age or aging since we hit our forties. How oh how do you broach this topic? Going from a nubile, tight skin, sensual woman to a middle age, menopausal one hits like a sledgehammer.
I immediately thought I would have to deal with the loss of my femininity, fertility, dry patchy skin, increase body hair, thickening midriff, aches and pains, memory loss and the dreaded hot flashes. Yes! The hot flashes that appears when you least expect it and causes a burning sensation beneath the skin, water pouring down your face, legs and arm and the embarrassment of being in the public where you seem to be the only one that is hot while everyone else appears cool. It can be a lonely journey presenting an outward appearance of calm, maintaining the you that society expects, whilst going through this period of life on your own.
So I explored all the alternatives. I considered going down the HRT route, and although this option seems like a lifeline to retain the status quo, I realisation that this in itself had long term health implications that far outweighed the minor problems that I would experience in the short term. So I pushed forward with the knowledge that this journey like the previous journeys in my life I would have to tackled head on with a more holistic and natural approach and just embrace the changes that was naturally occurring in my body.
I realise that despite what all the books and anecdotal evidence says, this was something for me to embrace. The menopause was not the boogie man, something to be scare of, it was not the death of me as a woman. This just meant a new chapter, blank pages for me to write the story of the rest of my life. So I deal with all the negatives that the menopause presents. I thank god that I am alive to experience every stage of my life, the positives and the negatives, good and bad and what stands out loud and clear after the initial panic is that the young, enthusiastic, carefree me has morphed into a middle age woman who has not only matured enough to handle and embrace the next chapter of her life, but is looking forward to my post-menopausal self and all the freedom that it entails. So I will exercise more, moisturise more, rub my aches and pains. Smile through the perspiration and continue to glow.
I will say to all my sisters of similar ages and experiences, look on this as a positive. Take stock and recognise that the mature, confident you, can be just the boost that your ego requires at this particular time in your life. So smile, flirt and enjoy the you that now have the freedom of grown children, disposable income and the whole world at your feet and a great reason to enjoy it.
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